A new study published in the journal Pediatrics says SpongeBob could ruin kids’ ability to pay attention, delay gratification, and think.

This explains everything!

Eliane watching SpongeBob

 We own a few SpongeBob seasons on dvd, and I have, on occasion, been guilty of using the energetic, optimistic, and entertaining sea sponge as a babysitter.

Hell, the series was created by a marine biologist! Most likely the best baby sitting candidate in my dvd cabinet!

But causes attention deficit? Yeah if the show is on! I can´t keep my eyes off it. The characters are fun, cute, and the writing is brilliant!

Delay gratification? Right. How on Earth could a SpongeBob watching child not benefit from the emotional happiness the show exudes? I giggle constantly when watching and without delay! It is a funny show!

Interfere with a child´s ability to think? Well, I can´t speak for everyone´s children, but my youngest takes pictures of SpongeBob ALL THE TIME!

Photo by Eliane

Just last week I had to erase 153 perfectly centered SpongeBob photos in order to capture a few memories from Esten´s soccer game. Proof of thought.

AND, I have caught all three of our children discussing what plankton might be, what jellyfish eat, why SpongeBob´s boat has wheels, why he fails his boat license test each time, and why no air bubbles come out of their mouths when they talk. Go figure.

Seriously, researchers determined that 4-year-old kids who watched nine minutes of “SpongeBob” compared to kids who watched PBS programming did significantly worse on four tests they administered. The study involved 60 kids.

While I admit some PBS shows are more sedating than SpongeBob, the show is creative, witty, and in many instances educational. I also understand the fast vs. slow pace concern of lighting and flashing that could pose issues with some children.

But get this, none of the children were tested prior to watching the shows!

RED FLAG! Get out of the water!

Creating no baseline in research to compare data yields flawed results fit for a neighborhood in the proximity of a Pineapple under the Sea!

Until more thorough research findings are released,

`I´m ready, I´m ready, I´m ready´….

for more goings on in Bikini Bottom with our children.

Hopefully my reasoning will not cause me to be remembered as,

in the words of Plankton, `That naive cube!´