Posted on April 13, 2011
Our oldest son ran in the house today on his lunch break from school announcing he needed his bat. And before I could respond he further added, `Don´t worry, I´m not gonna hit anyone this time.´ And in a flash, he was back out the door. I could not help but laugh, and if you don´t get the joke, well you must read my original blog post entitled Baseball Anyone. After all, it is the story that began this blogging addiction of mine.
Anyway, I started reflecting upon the funny stories this child has instigated; for example, the time I arrived to preschool pick up and the firing squad was waiting outside for me. I kid you not, two teachers and the headmaster were waiting outside when I drove up. At first I did not give them much thought. I smiled, said hello, then proceeded to walk past the women not realizing it was me they were aiming for.
Teacher: Ms. Mengshoel
Me (still smiling):Yes?
Teacher: We need to have a word.
Me (smile most likely beginning to look fake): Sure, what´s going on?
Teacher: Your son pulled down a girl´s pants today.
Me (fake smile gone): He did what?
Teacher: Your son pulled down a girl´s pants today, and we feel this is a serious matter.
My mind was swirling like a vortex going out with the bath water, but I found a plug. My son is only three years old. What could his intentions possibly have been? So I asked if there were more to the story? And they explained how the teacher on duty was drawing a hopscotch grid on the ground when the little girl came crying to her announcing Erling, my son, had ripped her pants off. They asked her what had happened, but she was too upset over the situation to talk.
Me: Did you ask Erling?
Teacher: He was taken inside, but he isn´t talking either. We are hoping you can get the story out of him.
Perplexed as to how an entire playground full of children witnessed the event, yet not one child had a story to tattle, I went inside and got Erling. We walked quietly to the car and he climbed into his car seat. As I buckled him secure, he asked, `Mommy are you mad?´
Me (calmly): Well, the teachers seem to think you pulled someones pants down today.
Erling (looking down at his hands): Yes mam.
Me: You did?
Erling: Yes mam.
I closed his door, opened mine, and climbed into the driver´s seat. Then, I closed my door and started the engine. I was counting to ten as well as trying to imagine what on earth he had been thinking.
Me (still calm): Why would you pull down someone´s pants?
Then I braced myself for some deranged answer that I was not mentally prepared to handle.
Erling (in a frustrated tone): Mom, she was on top of the slide, just sitting there! She refused to go down! I knew I would get in trouble if I pushed her off, so I climbed down and attempted to pull her out-of-the-way. But all I could reach was her pants leg, and well, her pants came off! Then the teacher made me go inside. I was so mad at the teacher that I refused to talk to her for the rest of the day.
A very real grin stretched across my face as I thought to myself, little boys are a bundle of good intentions surrounded by misunderstood drama. Armored with this knowledge, and a good story, I was able to convince the firing squad to drop their weapons… for now.
- Preschool Erling Jr. on right